Wild Order and Psalm 34

Starting out our homeschooling year in September had me pulling my figurative hair out.  It seems like each new year brings additional challenges to an already-full day, and this was no exception.  Trying to meet the educational/social (read: talking to me)/physical/spiritual needs of these six offspring had me in way over my head.  Just thinking about how to schedule everyone so that we could work without a thousand “MOM!  I need HELP!”’s in a morning looked like an intimidating uphill climb.  I honestly thought through my educational options (which are, quite frankly, limited)!  Dave, on the other hand, stayed sensible and encouraging.  (I would have given up a long time ago without his constant support and reassurance and commitment.)

 I sought the Lord and He heard my cry and delivered me from all my fears.

the crafty girls

Seven weeks later:  We are enjoying this year SO much.  I find myself reading with Kate and, much to my surprise, everyone else is busy working.  We get the chance to talk about people of the Middle Ages, the Renaissance, amazing explorers, and I find myself eyes-wide-open with wonder at how incredible it is to learn together, walk through life together, sit down at the table and work out our disagreements, open the Word together.  And I am reminded that I was ready to pull my hair out and send them away to school, desperate for peace and quiet, and instead He gave me grace for this, and then the blessing of this, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything!

Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame.

Not that it always feels peaceful and magical, mind you.  Most days it is like waking up at the top of the roller coaster, ready for that exhilarating ride that scares me to death, but makes me want to get on and go again the next day. 

 This poor man called, and the Lord heard him; He saved him out of all his troubles.

“I have finished the work you gave me to do,” says Jesus.  People were still left sick, possessed, lame, desperate.  He didn’t do it all, but he did what was in front of him.  And he rested and prayed, trusting that it would bring what just busyness couldn’t—fruitfulness. 

 The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and he delivers them. 

And some days feel absolutely scattered, but I keep praying for wisdom to know what is the next thing to do that’s in front of me.  I just want to get to the end of the day and be able to say with Jesus, “I did it!  I did what you wanted me to do!”  And the house might be messy, the schoolwork might even be left undone, but these six souls have gotten what they needed—not from me, but from God.  And anyone else who has blessed our premises has received what God intended, in whatever form that takes. 

Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in Him.

 hiking in the first hard rain of rainy season

I’m all in favor of an ordered life, but maybe God is calling me to live outside what seems “manageable”—out of my control, in a place where I don’t think I can do it, because then HE gets to do it, and I know it is HIM.  And He gets the glory.

Twice now in the past month one of our children has come and confessed, unprompted, humbly, that they have lied.  Not a “big” lie, not anything that has any more consequences, just because of conviction.  And then this same child, “Mom, do you think Baseki (our house worker) is a Christian?”  And the next day, same question, about Kate.  And God whispers to me again that HE is doing the work in that heart!  He can do it with me, and He can do it without me.  I don’t have to be everything to everyone, I just have to obey my Master with my whole heart.  

And live on this wild, trusting edge of life.

Fear the Lord, you His holy people, for those who fear Him lack NOTHING!

Adding to the wildness?  Jake tries his capable hand at throwing pizzas :)

I Do….not know what I’m doing!

Musa’s wedding last weekend provided another opportunity to get our cultural feet wet.  Even though we have lived here for quite a while now, there are still situations that make us feel like babies all over again: usually funerals, weddings, or large fund raising gatherings (which are more common than you might imagine and, quite frankly, occassions we generally try to avoid). 

waiting for the wedding, having "breakfast"--chicken, rice, beans, chipatis and chai

Dave had been asked to be best man, so I figured the kids and I would hang out and watch him make some cultural faux pas.  Little did I know, until four days before the wedding, that I might have a role in the ceremony.  “Did you get your dress made?” was the rude awakening to that fact.  “Huh??  I’m not even in the wedding!”  “Yes, you’re the best man’s wife!”  Evidently there were other additional roles that I wasn’t aware of.  I called Musa, who said casually, “Oh, it’s OK Beck, just wear anything…..that matches Dave’s tie, in the color of old man’s blood.”  Thankfully I had learned the day before that that is the phrase they use for “maroon,” so I wasn’t completely at a loss.  Shiny maroon dresses aren’t abounding in my wardrobe, but thankfully Launa had one I could borrow since she had just been in a wedding and had to wear the color of old man’s blood. 

Mavuno people, congratulating with a dance

the Bride and all her relatives arrive

This blog is going to get WAY too long if I go into all the details, but a couple of things stood out to me. #1: the wife of the best man has a big role here,

 and most of her job is to SMILE BIG, which I think is intended to make up for the entirely somber expression of the despairing bride, who is under strict orders to frown as much as possible and not speak a word, lest her parents think that she might be happy to leave them.

#2: the brother of Musa stood up during the ceremony to introduce himself and his wife, “the really fat mama over there,” who waved her hands to everyone with a big smile, as if to say, “Hey everyone, how’s it going?!”  That just doesn’t happen in my culture.  Then the pastor proceeded to say how he liked that, that he intended to make it his own goal to fatten up his wife as well.  Remember, fat is good here, and the larger your wife is, the more wealthy you must be.   

the aromatic spray

#3: It is OK, in fact, recommended, for the maid of honor to mildly assault both the bride and groom during the ceremony (while the pastor was giving his marriage words) and spray them with perfume in the armpit area.  Thankfully, I was not approached in this manner as well or I might have busted up laughing.  This occurred several more times throughout the day, but not again at so crucial a moment.

After the wedding, Musa, Lucy, Dave and I were led outside under a steaming tarp to eat a little meal of rice and meat and stomach (notice I didn't include that in the "meat" category).  Then we proceeded to the car to make the trip to Lucy’s house, where we had the reception. 

 

Musa and Lucy and the two of us were required to stand and receive all the gifts, one by one, shake everyone’s hands and drink soda.  Women and men came, dancing, carrying kangas (material for a wrap) or money or (my personal favorite) goats.  Lucy’s grandma gave them a bucket of all different kinds of seeds.  The kangas were abundant—a total of 94!  Those have two pieces each.  That’s a lot of cloth: Musa said he might open a store (he’s serious).  The goat was held high above the emcee’s head, bawling out its protest. 

 I loved it.

Lucy and Musa have a typical arranged marriage.  His aunt heard about this beautiful, faithful girl and introduced them.  Dave was able to go to the initial meetings—asking questions of one another in order to see how compatible they are.  The main ones for Dave and Musa were about her relationship with God, what did she believe.  But it was also a time to find out what Lucy wants to do after they are married (“I just want to take care of my home and be a good wife to Musa”).  In contrast to our culture of “I didn’t know he/she was going to be like this!”, Musa and Lucy know that they don’t know eachother well.  Just well enough to know that they are both committed to love one another until death.  “Love is a choice” has never been so true, and so expected!  It was BEAUTIFUL to watch this couple commit their lives to one another, trusting God that His plan for marriage is best and that He will help them to live together in a way that honors Him.